I remember story time. I remember the sweet joy of snuggling up with my kiddos, sometimes both girls at the same time and blissfully giggling over silly stories, guessing what happens next as we grew to chapter books, anticipating the next book in a series…yeah, that’s all over now. Welcome to tween and teenhood; otherwise known as a mother’s seven-year nightmare.

Now, I get the eye-rolling, exaggerated sigh and maybe a sneer, depending on the mood, and that’s from the one who actually likes to read. As they are my daughters, it should be built into their core—this innate desire to read, shouldn’t it? I mean, I love to read; so should they.

More eye rolling..I do know deep down that this is not realistic. I guess their well-being really isn’t dependent on a love for Jane Eyre.  But we do need to reach a middle ground; a girl has to read. I mean, how will they know if patent leather shoes really do reflect up? (Am I really that old?) And if they enjoyed it, all the better. So, how do I make that happen?

So, given I work in a library, Mom comes home with a bag of books. But I’ve learned a few lessons along the way. Do not tell them if this is one of your favorites; odds are they will not like it based on the simple principle that you could not possibly be on the same wave length. As any parent can tell you, it’s only on point if their friend or favorite YouTuber suggested it. Hint: check the YouTubers they follow–tons of possible subject matter there. While you’re at, since they are most likely on their phone, share an ebook with them. Say you found it on one of  Buzz Feed’s lists.

While at times I do break that rule out of sheer nerd book love and the crazy desire to share with my daughters, I again advise to be very careful. Do not say you loved a particular book and could not put it down–you will have lost them forever if they decide they hate it. Once you give a bad review, all trust is gone. A casual mention that you liked the book/author will suffice. Or better yet, say someone else recommended it to you. Go against your moral code here and embrace no accountability. (Unless, of course they liked it.  Go ahead and do that happy dance, and damn the rolling of eyes.)

Another cardinal sin I continue to make out of pure habit is to cringe at their reading choices when I should just be happy they are reading. My daughter loves fantasy and the paranormal. I hate it. I’ve said so. (I really don’t know where they get the sarcasm or the eye rolling from?)  Probably not cool.

The whole theory of practice what you preach comes into play here. Maybe try something they like. While I may open my mouth too quick, judging that book by its cover, I am a proponent of reading what you love. They have enough textbooks to study–my daughter’s heavy case load, her reason for not picking up a book. Actually an avid reader, I was almost even more disappointed that she wasn’t having fun reading any more. It took a new release from her favorite author, that I scored on the first day it was out, to get her back on track. Nothing like fangirl love to bring it all back. For the munchkin that doesn’t like to read, a book on slime-making and DIY,…wait for it…by her favorite YouTuber! Whatever it takes.

Despite the fact that they are not toddlers anymore, I still like to believe they can learn from me, and now I from them as well. I never picked up YA (gasp!) until my oldest was in middle school—I found a whole new world. And my very pretty copy of Jane Eyre will remain in a prominent spot on our bookcase and I am confident, it will be read, someday, by someone other than me.

None of this is probably new–especially, since you’ve come to read a library blog. You already know how to do the research and where to find the tools. But, what I’ve also learned as a parent, is that we do like to commiserate. You know, sharing is caring and all that nonsense…